America's Observance Madness

Just today, I was looking to see if I might have a paid holiday in June, so I Googled 'June Holidays' and what the hell do I get? This:

http://www.brownielocks.com/june.html

Effing 'Fish are Friends, not Food Week' (what the hell were these people smoking?), 'Upsy Daisy Day', 'Do-Dah' day, and wouldn't you know it - June is goddamn 'Pharmacists Declare War on Alcoholism' Month. Apparently it's unacceptable that people are dependent on alcohol when in the name of all that is right and decent they should be hooked on anti-depressants.

Christ, every day of the calendar commemorates some stupid shit or another in the US. Can't we just have one damn day that is a regular old day? One where you drag your tired old ass into work and then go home and eat dinner? Who in the blue funk celebrates 'World Infertility Month' or 'Find a Mate Week' anyway? Barren spinsters?

For God's sake people. Stop being idiots.